The NERVOUS STOMACH Series: Ego-Strategy 16 – TV NIGHT

Posted: August 18, 2013 in The NERVOUS STOMACH Series
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Thursday, January 03, 2008

The NERVOUS STOMACH Series: Ego-Strategy 16 – TV NIGHT
Current mood: In the twilight
Category: In the twilight Life

Okay, I’m thirty-six and vegging out in front of the big screen.  Not the regular big screen, the freakin’ awesome nine-foot-by-nine-foot projection I rigged up on the third floor.  Cooper is with me.  He likes the commercials where dogs bark — he tips his head and stares at the screen.  Tonight, we’re watching the Twilight Zone marathon on SciFi.  It’s the one where everybody’s afraid of the little boy in town.  The one with all the strange powers. 

When the little boy makes a guy disappear, Cooper begins to bark furiously at the big screen.  The boy looks directly into the camera.  Directly at Cooper and me.  “Shut up” he says.  Cooper stops barking immediately.

I should be frightened, but I’m mad.  “He wasn’t doing anything wrong!” I yell at the screen. 

The boy looks at me now.  “Drop dead,” he says, and a bolt flashes out of the nine-by-nine screen, right at my armchair.  I dive for the floor as the room explodes in a blue crackle that smells like burning hair. 

“Cooper, down!” I yell, giving him the raised arm signal the obedience trainer taught us.  Cooper hugs the floor. The little boy seems focused on us now.  He takes a deep breath, then points.  His arm comes out of the screen, right into our room. He cocks his thumb like a gun and gestures at my beloved doggie. 

“Bang bang” he starts to say, but now I’m not mad, I’m furious.  My dive from the armchair rolls around toward the screen.  I kick with my feet, like Keanu Reeves.  The kid’s arm goes down, as bullets pummel the carpet.  I reach and grab the arm, and give one, firm yank.  The kid falls out of the TV screen and onto my floor.  I quickly cover his mouth with one hand and hold his arms with the other. 

“I bet your parents don’t believe in spanking,” I say, as he struggles in vain. 

For FUN, I put my stuff at www.GregoryGerard.net
For SERIOUS, I put my stuff at 
www.JupitersShadow.com 
I invite you to visit my stuff.

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